By Aalya Dhanani , FlexGC Member
Whether you celebrate a particular holiday in December or not, this time of year in Canada is also a point of reflection on the year behind us. Usually it’s a time to appreciate and enjoy family and friends, and relax and reset ourselves as we enter the new year. But 2020 has been a difficult year for many of us and this December looks unlike any other we’ve experienced in recent history.
We are well on our way to the end of what has been a year for the history books.
2020 has tested our resilience, not only has it created a new set of conditions for us to live under, but it may have further amplified any pre-existing matters we were already struggling with.
It can be easy to get caught up in December merrymaking and ignore feelings of stress, anxiety, loss or other. Take some time and give yourself the space for these feelings, whatever they may be. They are completely valid and you are likely not alone in feeling them.
Here are some tips from our FlexGC team to help you prepare for the holidays:
1. Accept and admit your feelings — just because it’s the holidays does not mean you need to force yourself to feel happy, but it is completely fine if you do.
It is alright and normal to let yourself be in your feelings whether you feel loss, sadness, anger, or excitement. Give yourself permission to take that space for your feelings and don’t be hard on yourself about them. It is okay to not be okay. Once you let yourself do this, you can begin to move forward.
2. Do one nice thing for yourself every day — take the opportunity to do things for yourself. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, ideas include:
- Enjoying your favourite hot beverage
- Taking a bubble bath
- Holding screen-free time
- Reading a chapter of a book
- Savouring your favourite meal
- Indulging in your favourite holiday activity
3. Ground yourself — there are helpful techniques you can do to help manage your feelings when confronted with a mental health crisis. When in this state, anxiety and stress can cause your heart rate to go up, these exercises can help slow that down and ground you.
- Deep breathing — take more full, deep breaths. Try this deep breathing exercise.
- Alternate nostril breathing;
- Box breathing;
- Or, check out this 4-step breathing exercise
- 5 Senses technique — list out loud: 5 things you can see; 4 things you can touch; 3 things you can hear; 2 things you can smell; 1 thing you can taste
- Reflect on one thing you’re grateful for every day
“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” — Robert Brault
4. Reach out — Connection is important. If you’re feeling down, you are probably not the only one. Reach out to a friend or family member, check in on your people. This will make you feel less alone and will do wonders for the people you connect with, too.
5. Focus on the opportunity — even though you may not be able to take part in your traditions, this may be an opportunity to embrace the change and create new ways to celebrate or find moments each day to better connect with yourself and/or with your community. It may be an opportunity to embrace doing nothing and slow down. It may be an opportunity to try things you’ve been meaning to but never made the cut in the past.
CBC offers this helpful Acts of Kindness Calendar which has ways to practice generosity and connect with your loved ones.
6. Plan the alternative version — instead of clinging to the traditional version of your holidays, plan ahead for what the alternative version could look like. Here are some ideas we’ve heard:
- Having everyone set their video background to a specific theme or wearing specific attire (ugly sweaters, reindeer hats etc.)
- Doing a collaborative activity online together (e.g. holiday themed puzzle, gingerbread/craft kits) and maybe turn that into a friendly competition between households
- Doorstep delivery gift exchange
There are more tips on how to plan a safe holiday or celebration on canada.ca.
7. Volunteer and donate — find a charity or organization that you haven’t previously supported. Learn more about it and donate your time, efforts, goods, or money.
Most importantly, remember there are places and people who can help. If you’re a federal public servant, find confidential and free mental health services and supports on the Mental health and COVID-19 for public servants resource hub.
If you’re in an immediate crisis, please contact Crisis Services Canada 24/7 or dial 9–1–1 for emergencies.
Remember, wherever you are on your personal journey, whether this year has challenged or improved your mental state, be kind to yourself. Take care of your mental health in a way that works for you, whether that means being more connected with others, spreading kindness, or enjoying some quiet time.
